It's uncanny.

It’s uncanny.

by David Evans

Canadian ’crosser Geoff Kabush announced today that he has taken the position of understudy in the new Broadway production, ‘Wolverine: Lone Wolf.’

When called for comment, Kabush expressed his joy at being able to supplement his race season with “emergency” appearances on Broadway. “It’s a great gig. I’ll be spending a lot of the summer rehearsing in New York, but after that I’ll be able to race as per usual and fly back to Broadway when the lead actor is sick or on leave. It’s the best of both worlds, really.”

Kabush made it clear that this won’t be conducive to his best season on the bike, after a solid year with an eighth place in the Olympics in MTBing, a spot on the cyclocross Worlds team, and appearances in many of the USGPs, but the trade-off came at a perfect point in the Olympic cycle. “I’ve made no secret of my love of the character, nor for musical theater. I’ll need to put on some upper body mass, sure, but it’s a dream come true. It’s still sinking in.”

‘Wolverine: Lone Wolf’ is the next project from the team behind the beleaguered and expensive ‘Spiderman: Turn Off The Dark’ which opened in June 2011. Music and lyrics were provided by Bono and The Edge of U2.

“I was a bit dispirited at the end of the 2012 season, and my coach told me that I needed to find some new motivation. From my first meeting with Bono, this just felt right.” Kabush continued, “That guy [Bono] is hilarious! At a meeting last week he wore a slogan t-shirt that said ‘Don’t push me, I’m close to The Edge.'”

A press release from the agent of Irish rock band U2 confirmed their involvement in the project. “Bono and The Edge first spotted Geoff on the way to his eighth place at the Olympic Mountain Bike race, and knew they’d found something special.”

Kabush agreed to demo a few of the songs for Cyclocross Magazine, including the sure-fire hits ‘The Third Cut Is The Deepest,’ ‘She Wolf, He Wolf?,’ and ‘It’s Not Easy Being Wolverine.’

[Ed. note: This was one of a handful of stories posted on April 1 for a little April Fools’ fun.]